Chess by Dim Light
Way after last call, we spill into the street
In the first euphoric seconds it makes sense to miss the 501 eastbound
Pausing in doorways on the stumble homeward
I never said I wanted your undying
We are both far from home
You kiss in another language
Wake up speaking it
Twenty-one years old and ravenous, decadent,
You lift chocolate bars from convenience store shelves
And make a mess of them in bed, an unknown
Using phrases your body hasn’t experienced
You look how I imagine Raskolnikov
Your speech slurs sexy between kisses;
Envious of your ability to sleep deeply in a strange bed,
I steal your profile for a future poem
You need a shave, a wash, to have your head examined,
You need to concentrate for five seconds
I can see you a schoolboy in some dusty sunlit room
Daydreaming yourself always someplace else
I remember your face framed in my camera’s lens,
Eyes a violent mix of frightened/hard/repentant
I could not take your photo
your expression stayed with me for days
My body which is to say my head was not ready for you
Because you don’t read you fail to say anything new
In love you favour form over content
At dawn I reach behind me for a book, words like anchors
Four in the morning and no philosophy is sound
The most profound thoughts unfinished
And impeccable grammar suspect
2003