writer bios

Who regularly contributes to Gadzooks!?

Lotsa folks. Here are a couple of the names and some bios for them that I totally made up. Keep in mind that what is written here is complete & utter fiction. Writers: to correct these biographical injustices, please contact our beloved editor to put up proper bios.

Andrea Ledwell - our own precious pixie from the east, she actually doesn't write her stories, but enchants unwary travelers who accidentally wander into her fairy circle. She has a deep passion for all things Yanni.

Mark Rathwell - A dark and disturbing occurrence deep in Mark's past has driven him to assume the guise of a giant lizard by day. Transforming into his true self at night, he pens his Gadzooks tomes in the dark to avoid having to proofread his own work. Mark's likes include bags of money, and sharp cheddar.

Derek Forgie - Sedate, almost to the point of unconsciousness, this narcoleptic sod barely manages to crawl out of the covers ten minutes before it's time to go back to bed. Derek enjoys monkeys, tinkertoys, and small pebbles.

Lydia Shaw - A graduate of the school of hard knocks, this rough and tumble old bat is ready to fight with anyone who looks at her sideways. Don't cross Lydia's path until she's downed her first methadone dose of the day. Lydia likes spitting, and biting.

Greenfern - Jiminy Cricket's sidekick. She's 16" tall and likes ponies.

Richard Jones - one of the founding members of Gadzooks! Richard has a penchant for pink leotards and speaking to himself in an effeminate whisper when he thinks no-one is around.

Rod Weatherbie - another founding member and also the editor of Gadzooks!, Rod is a misogynist of the highest order. He typically degrades women and thinks that the world should be run by an old boy's network while the womenfolk get on with the cleaning & back massages.

Nanmac - Nan likes, sundaes, long walks in the park, and is Gadzooks! local conservative advocate. A long time member of the Reform national party, she quit when they merged with the Progressive Conservatives because she claimed they'd "gone pink" on her.

Isaac Meyer Odell - Issac is actually not a real person at all, but another one of Lydia's personalities. When Lydia starts scratching her crotch and belching, everybody knows Isaac has arrived. Likes: Bitches. Dislikes: Hos.

Danielle Benacquista - Danielle is integrating nicely back into society.

Sid Madriga - Sid is a UFOLOGIST in his spare time, gazing up at the stars, certain that a ship will come down & pick him up. After all, they dropped him off 2 years ago and said they'd be right back.

If I've forgotten anyone, rest assured, I will be adding your name to the list, so be sure to do a pre-emptive strike & send your real bios in!!!